Skip to content


Your bag is empty

Article: Sexual Spontaneity


Sexual Spontaneity

spontaneous sexuality

Embracing sexual spontaneity involves approaching sexual activities with an open mind.

It plays a pivotal role in relationships by increasing connection and igniting excitement. There can be quite a few barriers to sexual spontaneity; it's normal to experience them and important to recognize them. Getting “stuck” in routine is one factor that can hinder spontaneity. Many individuals I work with feel disconnected from the present moment because they are on autopilot, which can decrease openness to spontaneous sexual experiences. Mental stress is a common factor for low sexual desire thereby decreasing desire for spontaneity. Relationship factors, such as poor communication, can put a strain on the sexual relationship. Lastly, low self-esteem or self-doubt may elicit negative thoughts about initiating sexual activity, possibly out of the fear of rejection. Thankfully, mastering sexual spontaneity is absolutely attainable with practice!

Here are some ways to increase spontaneity:

  1. Communication

    • When was the last time you explored what you desire or fantasize about with your partner? Take time to listen to one another without judgment. Creating a space where you can feel open may be just the thing you need to ignite a spark and get creative. 
  2. Disrupting Routine

    • Breaking out of everyday routine helps reduce anxiety. If it works for you and your partner to get into the mood, try scheduling moments of spontaneity. This can also look like going out on a spontaneous date throughout the week when normally you stay home.
  3. Reducing Stress

    • Stress and anxiety take us out of the moment or make us feel like we don’t have time to engage in something spontaneous. Taking just a couple of minutes of uninterrupted time a day to breathe or exercise can help reduce overwhelming feelings.
  4. Play

    • Many adult-friendly games make sexual spontaneity easy! You can also try new ways to sexually explore with your partner. Take a look at the blog post, Scent, Taste, and Pleasure to get some ideas for incorporating new fun ideas in the bedroom.
  5. Creating Excitement

    • Sexual spontaneity does not necessarily mean sexual activity needs to happen at an exact moment you or your partner want to engage. You can build up to the sexual activity slowly. By increasing anticipation for one another, sexual experiences can flow more naturally and are something to look forward to.


Sweetums Wipes are advocates for embracing positive sexual health experiences. Enjoy using Sweetums Wipes as you continue to explore sexual spontaneity!

Leave a comment

This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.

All comments are moderated before being published.